2021 Reflections

Much of this year has been that of carry overs. In January, I celebrated 2 years of sobriety from alcohol. March will be 2 years of attending my Church on Facebook Live. I haven’t missed a day. I’ve attended once in person and that was just a couple of months ago.

I’m at 557 consecutive days of Spanish. 2 years will be here soon enough.

I started low carbs this March, and in August, Music Movement Therapy.

I had some trial and error with the low carbs, a couple of bouts of Diverticulitis and CKD was riled up for a time being.

I’ve lost about 37 pounds so far. In the last 8 months, I’ve had to do liquid diet a few times to ease the belly and colon pain. I took oil of oregano for that. Anytime, I need an antibiotic this is what I use. Apple juice, bananas, most soups, aren’t low in carbohydrates. I tried not to worry about that.

My mornings are Tylenol, Ibuprofen, or the combination of both immediately upon waking. Coffee, and a few counter stretches.

I make our dinner everyday. I often have food started in the crockpit by 9:00 a.m.

Of course, I scroll Facebook with that first coffee and then feed my dogs.

There’s resting in between it all. My routine is fairly solid. My little exercise session comes next. I generally do my Spanish in the evening after dinner is served. We eat by 4.

I connected YouTube on my TV last week or so. I actually did that to watch Gohl Method videos and demonstrations. Which I’ve done several times now and will continue to.

My workout songs are on YouTube but I’ve been using headphones via my phone. Once I had it streaming on the TV, I did my movement from there. And then I tinkered with other channels.

I’m watching The Language Tutor. Spanish. I like how it’s taught and presented. It teaches the language not just the words. I’ve also watched movies and novelas. English subtitles.

It’s been so important to keep busy, my body doesn’t always go without lag, and some days can be too rough, but I can’t let my mind become idle. It’s the devil’s playground.

I’m still recovering from those mental breakdowns. Sometimes people think once the event or action is over it should all be forgotten and done with.

Thanksgiving Eve 2021 – Stronger Than Pain

It’s not! Now you have to face all the pain, hurt, depression, despair, anxiety, fears, and heartache that led you there.

The aftermath. Repairing. Choosing to live and creating a new path for it.

And then coping with all of the other things that simultaneously occur.

Loved ones hurting, sick, and in pain, helpless, stressors, worry, and caring for yourself all at the same time.

I stay as busy as possible, pray, and love.

Love!

I stay away from drama. If someone messages me negatively about someone else, I’m out! If they contact me because I’m not doing enough, or rather anything, for the Chronic Pain Community, I’m out! If a family member wants to gossip about another, yep, you got it, I’m out! 99 percent of the time, I send them off with love, care, and prayers, and wholeheartedly mean it, and thats it. The other 1 percent is left on read.

Family, even friends, tend to believe because they’re family that they are entitled. They aren’t. If anything, information is a courtesy not an entitlement. I’m speaking of those that I’m not close to in any way not of those I am.

It’s bothersome when they don’t recieve info from us so then they go through the back door to other people to get the scoop on what we wouldn’t tell them.

That’s disrespectful and quite low.

My point is that participating in, listening to, or reacting to such things would heighten my anxiety, provoke depression, cause me to over think and raise my physical pain levels.

There’s no peace in that.

I dont usually make a new years resolution. I can’t take on much more right now physically or mentally because I don’t want to become overwhelmed and crash. However, I’m going to increase my 2 lb weights to 3 lbs at the beginning of 2022.

I’m hoping that low carbs, weight loss, and movement/strengthening increases my energy at some point. I have none and having Narcolepsy and sleep disorders on top of it all is extra challenging. Praying.

I’m going to a Christian Concert December 12. I’ll be able to sit as necessary and stand as able,

My Auntie took me to prayer service the same day this photo was taken. It was a good day! Blessed.

I’m working on getting out a bit more. My social anxiety isn’t in check enough for much and weight bearing is what it is at any given moment. My emotions are mixed. The majority of me doesn’t want to be out in the world at all. Sad.

I’m trying though.

One thing is for certain, I’ll be 3 years alcohol free in about 6 weeks.

Progress continues.